Committee to Elect #008: Mr. 305 vs. Little Marco for Senate

June 22, 2017

We're getting ahead of Marco Rubio's reelection six years ahead of schedule. We will bend time, space, and politics to our will to put Pitbull in the United States Senate. Dale.

On the docket: Mark sees the light, Alex hits the pillow, kissing a man in Fort Lauderdale, Mr. 305, Mr. Worldwide, politricks, The_Cuba_Enjoyer logs in, CTE Live from Guantanamo, Radical Centrism: Bullshit for Millennials, running with purpose, disruption of voter enthusiasm, Jez Watch 2017, you don't need these extra houses, radicalizing Pitbull, you thought this was a joke but we actually love Pitbull, the CTE Cultural Mavens take you by the hand, Help Wanted.

Music: Cold Funk Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License
creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

00:0000:00

Committee to Elect #007: Across the Pond

June 9, 2017

God save the Queen and the spy who came in from the cold! The Committee hopped a submersible lorry across the pond and got right chuffed in the Chunnel on this week's episode of CTE. It is not lost on us that this is also Episode 007. Cheers, and Sinn Fein for US Congress.

Before we get to the docket, early in the pod, we discuss Nurx, a convenient, affordable, and discrete way to get your birth control. Check it out at https://app.nurx.com!

On the docket: Dog Days, Loot Crate for your uterus, the Legend of the Shit-Gremlin, speaking truth to power on bathroom issues, Ivanka Trump dream interpretation, HBO's "TRUMPED" casting call, animated love, Mr. Comey returns to Washington, holding onto hope, Gramps McCain Retire Please, Crooked Hillary in 2018, descending upon the UK, zero seats declared, playing hard-to-get with voters, THE ABSOLUTE BOY HAS DONE IT, the Vale of Clwyd & Tooting, a parliamentary primer, the Pee Tape exists, #WYB ruins your childhood, The Sorcerer's Owned.

Music: Cold Funk Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License
creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

00:0000:00

Committee to Elect #006: Leader of the #Resistance

June 1, 2017

Happy Thursday! Here's Episode 6, a very cool, very angry, and very sexual episode you definitely won't want to miss.

On the docket: Queen of Podcasts, Kushner: The Experience, regular reminder that all of these people are just dumb, open invitation to literally fight Audrey, Hillary's back and we hate this, Blown Out in Iowa, we punch rightward, Cory Booker also sucks and we tell you why, #MAGA Loot Crate for Racists, Audrey hates Mark's good joke about Hillary, get Katy Perry under police protection, Texas's shitty and racist Charles Sumner (a.k.a. Shootout at the OK Corral, but boring), #WYB: G7 Edition, Doubling down at the Drafthouse, from the D-List to Daesh, covfefe isn't funny anymore, PissPugGranddad, AP Gov Sexual Awakening, we run a tight ship on twitter dot com.

Podcast Recommendations from the gang:
-Sawbones
-Bitch Sesh
-District Sentinel Radio

Music: Cold Funk Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License
creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

00:0000:00

Committee to Elect #005: Diamond Joe Biden for DSA President

May 25, 2017

Oh sheesh, y'all! It's Episode 5, our debut to the big, bad world of podcasting on iTunes, and boy have we landed the biggest client. We think you'll really like this one--but why not show us some love in that *fine* review section? We love you. Ride the wind.

On the docket: Tiny houses & big despair, Bernard Sanders toe to tip, hooking a big one on the left, radicalizing Amtrak Joe on Twitter dot com, dressing for the job you want, Trump on the go, Weapons for Wahhabists, Mark is Orb, The Feminine Mystique 2: Saudi Purity Tour, satire is hard, Operation: Biden Drop, woke Bedouins, a reminder that the GOP literally wants you dead, Big News from Big Sky Country (it's misdemeanor assault), Rob Quist's Gonorrhea Quest, Paul Ryan's Ice Cream Escape, we go off on our favorite vine for a bit, Cheers & Jeers, #WYB, we invent Wrestlemania, 1 Review = 1 Prayer, post-credit bonus.

Music: Cold Funk Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License
creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

00:0000:00

Committee to Elect #004: Susan Sarandon for Special Prosecutor

May 22, 2017

Welcome to Episode 4! Please bear with us as we seek a more permanent home for CTE, but until then, we’ll be hanging out over at archive.org. This is an extra special episode for an extra special man–We love you, Roger Ailes.

On the docket: Gender is cancelled, getting our lobbying muscles SO diesel for a fellow Bernard Brother (or are we?), pro shit-wading strategy, secrets secrets are no fun, “You’ve reached the Mad Dog,” screaming at and from Sean Spicer, memos are your friends, gotta have those tapes, Susan Sarandon Hunger Strike, When will we get rid of this human Love Canal?, Can we leave him in Riyadh?, Kink Abdullah II, how not to run a prison, Welcome Back Drug War, Mark goes *off* on mandatory minimums, more news actually broke while we were recording, Would You Bottom? takes a sharp turn into the Mushroom Kingdom.

00:0000:00

Committee to Elect #003: Alex v. Brock Maleborn for Des Moines, IA Gender-Sheriff

May 22, 2017

We're genderboys this week and halfway through the episode Audrey starts sounding like she's trapped at the bottom of a well, but you're all just going to have to take it.

Music: Cold Funk Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License
creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

00:0000:00

Committee to Elect #002.5: Praise the Skull

May 22, 2017

Hey gang. So we’re not exactly sure where this came from, and we don’t remember recording it, but it seems like it was from about 2 weeks ago. Enjoy this CTE B-Side!

On the docket: Do not look directly at the Skull.

00:0000:00

Committee to Elect #002: Bret Chudson for (Student Body) President

May 22, 2017

Episode two is here! In the wake of a debilitating loss (not our fault), the crew is taking what we can get, which is to say Mr. & Ms. Chudson are paying us to run their sweet alt-right son Bret’s campaign for Student Body President. We are sorry.

On the docket: Intersectionality, E-Mo-Tion in the Windy City, Chels shit the bed, #ShePerspired, the crew becomes trust fund babies, definitely a fake college organization, “White supremacists? In this economy?” Answer: Yes, a flawless segue to France, hot for teacher, Le Pen for all seasons, keep scaring these people, a monumental dive into Old Dominion, how to say hello to the Governor, horny for the Stars & Bars, the Great HAIM Disappointment, the Great HAIM Obsession.

00:0000:00

Committee to Elect #001: Old School

May 22, 2017

Here’s our first episode! In our debut, the crew takes on Chelsea Clinton’s campaign for New York State Senate against local icon and miniature horse, Poni Ernst.

On the docket: John Lewis’s failing district, flipping through the 6th with our woes, blue language in red states, a send-off to Daddy O’Reilly, sub/dom politics, SCOTUS Silver Fox & Snackmaster, Transdimensional Audreys, Sizzler Commencement, guns, and faux guerrilla art.

00:0000:00